Hobbyist are not hobbying, I’ve been noticing this trend.
Let me define “hobbyist”, I’m talking about message board hobbyists. Men who don’t just review escorts but are active message board participants. So really what I’m saying is message board hobbyists are not hobbying. They are not paying for the intimate time of an escort. Sure the bad economy is a factor but i noticed the decline of message board participants actually hiring escorts before the economy was an issue. They post on escort oriented message boards, they flirt with escorts online, they spend countless hours in chat rooms with like minded men and escorts who are desperately vying for their attention, they send saucy PM’s and emails, they attend meet and greets and play grab ass in public, they inquire as to availability of escorts as if they are interested in booking, they make sure to ask for a special or a discount because of their message board reputation, they create online relationships, but I’ve been noticing a giant trend toward message board hobbyists not actually making appointments getting in their cars, laying their cold hard cash down on the table and seeing the escorts they are engaging with online. So i started to think as to why.
Why does someone see an escort? Mainly its because something is missing in their life. They could be in a marriage where the sex is greatly decreased, or they have an need for sexual variety that being in a marriage prohibits, they are single and between committed relationships (though in general there are less of the single guys than the marrieds) they are missing excitement, the thrill of flirtation, the feeling of being desired, wanted and sexually sought after.
So if they can get all that buy joining a message board and never leaving the comfort of their computer why wouldn’t they? Basically they are having affairs with women they find sexually desirable, who openly flirt, engage, send them naked, salacious pictures to entice them to visit, tell them how much they are desired, wanted and needed and they never have to open their wallets, never have to leave the chair in front of the computer, except to go to a meet and greet, social or lunch and pretend that all the chicks there WANT them and play a little grab ass.
There are many mini dramas on message boards and often its a couple of escorts who are fighting over a client. The truth of the matter is its a money thing with the girls but they would never come out and say that. It’s unspoken so that the man can have his fantasy. Its not a transaction, the girls are after but HIM. We get too business like and we get branded “all business” and that’s not good for “business” the big lie is that were in it for the sex and not the money.
Ive noticed with my business, personally its taken an interesting turn. Most of my new clients and many of my existing clients are not message board hobbyist or “hobbyists” at all. They are often men new to the idea of hiring an escort, they have found me though an ad on a mall site or more often though this blog. Or maybe they write the occasional review but usually only at the request of the escort. They don’t spend countless hours yanking chains and low balling ladies on message boards or pitting them against each other so that they can feel like a hot commodity. They simply want some intimate time with a willing partner they find attractive. This is a sentiment I’ve heard echoed by ladies across the nation self identified hobbyists are not hobbying .
Its an election year and that always is a precursor to a shift in the sex for money biz. Couple that with the failing economy and you have a lot of ladies in the biz suffering… BUT add in this message board phenomenon and and shine a light on it and you will see a whole new ball game emerge. The solution is of course to develop a client base not centered around message boards which i personally have been doing for some time. Is it more difficult…yes. Is it harder to screen your clients to make sure they are safe… yes. Is it worth it… oh hell YES.
As with any business you need to keep your fingers on the pulse and not fall into the trap of always doing whats easy and never getting off the path of least resistance. For a while there message boards were a gold mine, it was an easy way to find the like minded folks and to make a pretty penny dong it but they have evolved into something else and are no longer worth the investment of so much time energy and resources. The pay off isn’t there anymore. They shouldn’t be abandoned all together, why throw out the baby with the bath water. Use them as tool they can be just like you’d use any other business tool but they shouldn’t be regarded as the Golden Calf either. That idol was false and fleeting and we all know what happens when you you worship at that alter….. you might just get your temple torn down.
Interesting post. Do you see the reviews boards falling by the wayside in that ladies no longer participate?
Right you are, JD. The guys that post endlessly on the boards are not ideal clients. They’re lacking in either looks, personal grooming habits, personality or a career that keeps them busy. It’s a lesson new girls have to learn the hard way. Until now, I never thought of the boards as a substitute for actual in-person companionship, but you are absolutely correct. It’s really just mental masturbation and there are alot of shy, lonely people out there in cyberland. p.s. I love your blog
Damn it! I knew there was something I was missing at the Meet & Greet. How was I supposed to know grab ass was to be expected?!?! *sigh*
Can we add the category of men who are involved in sexually-satisfying relationships but seek to satiate, through sex workers, their taste for variety, coupled with the desire for guaranteed NSA sex?
I have a pathological hatred for “hobbyists”. In fact, when I was escorting, I did everything in my power to dissuade them from ever calling or emailing me. I studied carefully their “requirements” and did the exact opposite. I saw great guys and never ever regret being in the business.
And the funniest thing….when ever a hobbyist did call/email and I refused him my time, he would become petulant and want the reason why. In the beginning I would be kind in the hopes that they would get a clue, but in their ego driven minds how dare a “hooker” refuse them service, so I got to the point of being brutally honest as to why I would not see them. I went so far as telling one persistent ignoramus that I would prefer a case of explosive diarrhea than spend any time with him.
Ladies, you can be a very successful escort minus the crude and manipulative review system set up by these adolescent simpletons.
JD- Right on the money. It’s 8-13-08 and looky who popped up on the LA Board this week to lend in some ‘filler’ posts, to contradict your statement~. have not seen THOSE hobbiests post under their handle in a long long time. It’s as plain as day,as to what they are both up to.
If girls stop giving more attention, more photos, more flirts, more emails, more PM, IM’s and texts away for ‘free’ on that board, then we would get back around to doing what we do second best best. Sucking long duck dong for dollars. What we do best, is run our minds and bodies like machines. If we don’t let them abuse the machines, [By doing the above without booking appointments with us] we will continue to run strong and successful.
You feed the troll for free, it’s never going to pay.
I experienced, this week, for the first time in years, an ‘offer’ of someone I have never met. I guess he thought I would be eager to ‘prove myself worthy’ and let him see me in person for free. His open chat of ‘lets just have coffee’ because i’m a big hooti-nanny well known poster and linger on the message boards lasted five miliseconds with me before I caught on to what he was trying to do. guilt me into seeing him for free. Oh Please.
I told him to fill out the paperwork like everyone else and get in line and pay like everyone else. I have a son to take care of and I don’t have the time to deal with his ‘I’m He-man, hear me now’ issues.
Keep Strong JD- keep stong. 🙂
I just checked your blog and was lamenting the fact that you haven’t written in a few weeks when you commented on mine! I request more posting, dear. That’s all I ask of you.
How do you get by with this failing economy? Good investments, homeowner, etc.?
Why continue to be in that line of work? I find it hard to believe that you can run your body like a machine and the work not taking it’s toll on you.
Anonymous1: I think the review boards are not the place to be looking for the bulk of your work and yes i see the participation of the ladies making them less attractive to be involved with. what i mean of course is the message boards which is very different from a data base of reviews.
Anonymous2: Its really become the substitute for actually MEETING an escort. sad but true.
Dviantboy: you get to play grab ass in public cuz you got the ass in person, naked and one on one! woot woot!
Mary: sure we can add those guys there are just much fewer of them.
Anonymous3: there are great guys out there who are not “hobbyists” there are some great guys who identify as “hobbyists” what im talking about are message board hobbyists not necessarily reviewers. though there is some cross over. Im talking about guys substituting real face time for saucy PMs and naked pictures and flirting so they never have to open thier wallets. the message board is the hobby not screwing the hooker.
but you do have a point 🙂
Anonyous4: I will keep strong you too babe! and you are correct-o-mundo!
Sabina! yah i know i a slacker, actually im hoping this blog will make a solid point so im leaving it up for a while. Plus ive been hella busy with photo work but i promise new blogs soon! just for your cute tasty ass 🙂
Anonymous5: I get by because there is still work out there for escorts. Do you have to work smarter?… yes. think out side the box?…. you bet. Sex for money is the oldest profession for a reason.
Hi Jenny, I just posted some questions for other working girls at my blog. Come take a look and leave a comment: http://www.peridotash.com/?p=247
Thanks!
Well Jenny, without a message board, I’m not sure I’d have ever hobbied. The whole thing seems too hit and miss without being able to talk to an escort I _might_ want to visit. Although I’ve spent a good bit of time communicating by email and pm with escorts, I’ve also spent about 16k in the last 12 months actually visiting a few of them at anywhere from $350-$1500 per visit. I’m interested in being a regular client for at most, two escorts, so an escort who is on a message board will have an opportunity to get and retain me as a client without too much effort if she is someone I want to visit. Most aren’t, but finding them any other way is too much work.
So true. I just entered into the world of being an independent and I love the people I choose to see but I will say out the first 43 responses I only visited with 2 gentlemen. I read up endlessly and was tempted to join boards but decided against it. I am also against getting reviewed; I’ve seen what those things say and I don’t want the liability. A majority of the men who sent me emails were pretentious DB’s trying to bargain with me and telling me to give them something (pictures or promises)to seal the deal… not happening, not ever. The kind of man I want to spend my high quality time with isn’t going to make foolish requests. I love the internet because it gives me a venue in which to put myself out there but it is also annoying to sort through all the pretentious self proclaimed hobbyists.
Oh well, at least they’re entertaining.
You are one of the smartest women I am lucky enough to “know” …
i prefer men that are too busy working to play games on message boards.
lol
leaders of the industry they are not.
oh wait a minute..hold that press conference, i gotta post something about this girls great dt skillls
Absolutely true. Review/message boards totally killed the desire for men to meet us in real life and pay us for our time.
Let's get the control back.
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