"Fraud and falsehood only dread examination"

Since hookers are the new black and by that i mean it’s almost acceptable to be a sex worker these days. There are T.V. shows, movies and articles written about us all the time now. Though its still not in the mainstream, it’s a lot more acceptable then it was just a few short years ago when i started working. As a result I’ve noticed a new trend. Though trend might be an over exaggeration. What I’ve observed is fake online sex workers. Yes i said fake. What that means is fairly high profile “escorts” that are not real working escorts. They are made up figments of their creators imaginations. With a little knowledge, a little research, it would be easy to make up a very salacious prolific online persona that was a sex worker and that is just what some people have done.

It angers me and makes me laugh my ass off, when I see people fall for this shtick. It angers me because these made up persona’s are setting themselves up to represent the profession I work in and they are not real. I work hard to give my honest account of the sex worker subculture and my place in it. To not sugar coat, sensationalize or glamorize what I do. I am as honest about it as I can be. When you see people who are just making up stuff out of thin air, being touted as “authorities” on the subject of sex work, when you see these sock puppets being as sensationalistic as they can be to draw as much attention to themselves as humanly possible…. its upsetting.

When you watch the blind masses falling for it, its often sad and hilarious. How betrayed will these people feel when they find out that hot sexy little minx they read the blogs of, follow on twitter or Facebook feel when its revealed that the “sex worker” isn’t a sex worker at all but some made up persona who doesn’t exist. Someone who capitalized on a trend that took the ball and ran with it and MADE UP a person? I think they will feel quite betrayed because they cheer for her, believe in her sexual freedom, encourage her to succeed and support her. They do get invested in her and she is not real. How much backlash will there be for us REAL sex workers when these fakes are eventually outed for what they are. For most sex workers who quietly go about their business it probably wont impact them much but for the activists who work daily to decriminalize and fight for the rights of sex workers and for a girl like me who does speak to the press, does write honest accounts about her feelings of being involved in this world, there will be just that much more work to do to convince people were not all drugged addicted, pimped out skanks, who cant do anything but spread our legs for a fast buck. That is the real disservice these fakes do. When it is revealed they are fake no one will believe that the intelligent sex workers who speak out…are real.

I was interviewed for the LA Times this summer. The reporter wanted to meet me face to face. I agreed after checking her and out ascertaining she was in fact real herself. She explained to me why she needed to meet me face to face, it was simple, she originally thought i wasn’t real. She wasn’t ingrained into the escort world (most reporters aren’t) She didn’t know how to asses someone legitimacy with reviews, screening services, etc.. she needed to confirm with her own eyes and a face to face interview that I, Jenny DeMilo was in fact the same girl who tweeted, wrote blogs and was in the pictures on my website.

She did this because she was a REAL reporter a professional journalist. That’s why i will acquiesce to certain media inquiries where they require a face to face. I know that professional journalists don’t just believe whatever the Internet tells them to believe and neither should you.

So think people. Use your noggin. Take the Woodward approach of needing two separate and reliable sources of information to confirm a fact. Don’t be so fucking gullible. Anyone can say hey are anything on the Internet. Astronauts, race car drivers, pirates, Tom Cruise and in the case of online hookers there are plenty of fake ones out there making up the most unbelievable crap and passing it off as legitimate and real.

I wont even get into the motivation behind perpetrating such a fraud because the Internet is a strange and weird world and people do all kinds of crazy shit from behind the protection of their computer screens. And no, i wont tell you who i know these frauds to be. If you use a little brain power you can figure it out in a hot New York second all by yourself.

5 common mistakes escorts make

Many aspiring escorts make rookie mistakes. many long time vets in the biz make them too. There’s no book you can read to tell you how to be a good escort and being a good escort is so much more then just knowing out to knock a clients socks off in bed or to be great client focused company. It’s running a small business and business practices do come into play, as well as using your common sense. Ive put together some common and typical mistakes escort make and some easy solutions.

1. Putting your menu on your website

DON’T do it! it can be used as evidence against you in a court of law. It really can. if you say “yeah i will have sex with you for XX dollars” they you are setting yourself up to get busted and to spend some time in the clink. You have just made yourself the easy target. Using code words like BBBJ, Greek, etc is the same thing. Just say you provide time and companionship. If someone needs specifics they can read the “fantasy” reviews other clients have written about you or some ladies without reviews provide references that potential clients can contact. Dont forget that exchanging sex for money is illgal and having a prostitution bust on your record will follow you around forever. they best thing is to do whatever you can to minimize that risk.

2. Using unprofessional and unflattering photographs

If you post nasty spread beaver shots then try to charge a hefty fee you wont get anywhere. You will get a nasty client. If every picture of you is a photo you took of yourself with your camera phone in a hotel bathroom mirror, you are putting yourself in the “cam phone” ho market. If you want to charge a pretty penny for your time, then you need to appeal to the clients with the pretty penny. That means investing in your photos. Men are visual creatures and you should present yourself in your most flattering light and that includes professionally shot, artfully staged photos. You cant be a thousand dollar escort with 100 dollar photos.

3. Undervaluing your worth

Don’t be desperate, look at your market, look at your competition. It’s not easy to jump markets and often where you position yourself is where you will stay. Geography does play a major role in how structure your rates so take that into consideration and then don’t undervalue yourself. What is you being an escort worth to you? 200, 500, 1500? setting your rate at 200 when your city average is 400 and your competition is in the 350 range and you may get a short term gain but there are clients who wont see a 200 girl if they are a 500 dollar guy and as i already said where you start is often where you stay.

4. Running your mouth too much

And by this i mean in your appointments. Don’t talk about your competition, don’t gossip with clients. They are some of the biggest clucking hens out there. They love to gossip. I’m talking about “hobbyist” who are involved in the community mostly. They love to pit girls against each other and cause lots of trouble. They also love to talk, talk, talk to other hobbyists. It makes them feel important like they know secret info. The best thing to do is a lot of smiling and nodding. Let them talk, you just smile. They bring up another escort you either say ” oh i dot know her but i hear shes nice” or “yes i know XX, shes been very kind to me” even if you hate the bitch. Don’t get suckered into gossip.

5. Using a canned website

Just as with professional photos you need a professional website and though canned template sites are great when you’re just starting out to get your feet wet. When you’re ready to step up your game and be a real professional invest in a domain name that YOU control and a professional website designer who can create you a site you can maintain and update yourself with a user friendly CMS (content management system) don’t be another cheap ass ho in line. Be an individual, show your personality and style. It will pay off.

Those are just a few of the common pitfalls i see girls making over and over again and they are easy to avoid if you put in a little bit of effort. Its well worth it and your bottom line will thank you.

Jenny DeMilo’s Cleavage

Jenny DeMilo’s Clevage, originally uploaded by Jenny Demilo.

Ive been taking some black and whites lately, mostly of my adventures around town (i post them often on twitter http://www.twitter.com/jennydemilo )I love the feel and mystery of black and white photos and moving forward i will be talking a lot more of them..of myself. I shoot most of all my own pictures and typically i use bright vibrant colors to accent my bright vibrant personality but I’m really enjoying getting a little moodier with shadow and light.

i shot this one this morning as i woke up with the light beaming in my bedroom window early in the AM. I know boys get morning wood, i however get morning cleavage.