I once had a friend, who’s a “hobbyist” we hung out, i liked him, he portrayed himself to be although at times a little immature for his advanced, age a nice guy who’s intentions and heart was in the right place. I couldn’t have been more wrong. It often takes a crisis to really see what someone is made of. You learn more about people about how they act when they are confronted with an emergency then you do sitting at dinner after dinner with them. Call it the stress reflex if you like.
This friend had a personal crisis and i saw a side of him i never thought i would. Mean, unethical, lying, lashing out. It made me sad, but it also made it impossible for me to continue to be active friends with him. I cant be around that kind of toxic poison. I was also a little upset with myself for being taken in but his outward facade.
In this business we often want to connect with people who understand and except what we do for a living. Its hard lying to the people around you all the time so we seek out like minded people, this is more often then not a HUGE mistake. It has been with me on several occasions. I am not immune to wanting to connect with people who share my experiences and my free spirited attitude.
In this case this “friend”has passively aggressively made attempts to make me feel bad, hurt my feelings, bait me into arguing with him on various message boards and even backhandedly threaten my business model – wtf.
I will continue to ignore him as best i can. its not always easy but i will try. Maybe he will buy himself a young pretty girlfriend soon and he wont have time to bother me anymore.
or get run over by a bus… oh a girl can dream.
OMG. The way you described my friend was somewhat the way I would describe my ex =/. He's trying to win me back now. I did love him a lot but I prefer not to be sucked in by toxic people.
Anyway, lovely blog! =)
Sad story. 🙁 I have a friend who used to be a sex worker. I knew her before she got into the business, and I'm still good friends with her now that she's retired. For a while I was even her driver. In any case, I didn't look down on her for what she did for a living. I thought it was fascinating, although I did worry for her safety at times.
Part of the problem I think is that sometimes men have trouble viewing sex workers as regular everyday human beings. And often when a hobbyist is able to do so it's because something emotionally has developed.
The male brain is a seriously screwed up thing. We evolved to have a brain and a penis, but not enough blood to work both at the same time. For this reason, I have a love/hate relationship with my member. I love it when it stops by to say hello, but I hate it because my IQ drops by about 100 points.