I recently read a blog by a feisty redheaded colleague of mine about why top tier experienced escorts are leaving the business and her take wasn’t the economy, it was dealing with idiot clients or those that wished to become them. I think shes right, the bullshit has increased. Maybe because escorting is more accessible to the masses so there’s a bigger pool of numb nuts who spend their time sending out inquiries. I don’t know the why of it but i know it happens. A recent inquiry i got seemed to fit right in with this theory. I was contacted via a screening service, the potential client had seen a couple other legit girls (though their rates were a quarter of mine) and they had vouched for his legitimacy. That’s always a good thing but this is the email he sent… verbatim.
“Just arriving in town and looking for a grerat time before I leave. Looking for a 2-3hr. appt. with trips to the Greek Isles if possible. Outcall if possible… dOUBLES ALSO IF POSSIBLE”
Oh take me away prince charming. I really am worth you at least running a spell check over your inquiry as i don’t generally provide “grerat” times. I’m spelling challenged myself but at least put in the bare minimum of effort, no one wants to deal with a lazy client, and you just showed me you are in fact lazy. Also what’s with the capricious capitalization on the thing about the doubles? Does it being mostly in all caps mean that its really, really important i bring another chick with me? The obvious glaring problem with this email is that this potential client uses stupid code for anal sex thinking that somehow that will circumvent the need for discretion. It doesn’t. You can say it what ever super secret code you like, its still being indiscreet and its really fucking annoying to get that kind of email from a complete stranger whom you have never communicated with before. The second issue is of course there no dates associated. Oh sure stranger who just broke escorting inquiry rule number one I’m free all the time, 24/7 at your convenience, I’m really hoping you will pay me money to stick your dick in my pooper and I’ll bring a random friend!
Now i know I’m being nit picky to some degree but if you have done any amount of research on me especially to the point where you are ready to make an inquiry to possibly spend some naked time then you should be well aware that i don’t usually let people nail me in the backdoor … yanno unless i’m married to you. Also that rule number one is discretion and discretion isn’t just I’ll not look like a 3 dollar whore when i show up to your 5 star hotel, its that you don’t ask me to exchange sex for money …. in email, on the phone or in person. I don’t care if you have a million other girls you banged vouch for you you. Screening services have all been infiltrated at one time or another to some degree they are not 100% fool proof. Don’t do it, don’t ask for sex in an inquiry. We all know why we are here, you pay, i provide. If you need it spelled out for you then you are looking for trouble! If you need to know about anal sex then do some research and find my reviews that are floating on the tubes and viola! You are now informed. If you cant do that i would guess the proliferation of the word GFE in association with myself all over my website with never a mention of PSE might be your first fucking clue.
I did write this potential client back with a link to my screening form, asked for dates/times and emphasized my GFE nature. Of course i heard not a word back. Because this guy was either a cop, a time waster or just your every day dick in your hand dumbass hobbyist, none of which i want to hang out with in any capacity.