An escort screening her clients is the number one thing she can do to stay safe in this often risky business. You MUST know who you will be opening the door to. Its an imperative, it will keep you free and it will keep you alive. Devising a screening process and staying on top of that process and keeping it current and relevant is something every escort must do and those that don’t will eventually end up in jail, hurt, or dead.
Screening is important. I will shout from the roof tops and often have how important it is to screen. I will also be just as vocal and just as passionate about how you do NOT give the “how” of screening techniques to non escorts. How you do not make that very important process available to just anyone. The HOW of screening, the specifics of what we do to verify and know who it is that will cross our door is a trade secret. Its a complicated process and there’s the 100 ways to skin a cat element as well as geographical concerns among many other nuances that need to be taken in to account. Its information we trade among each other and do not give to people who are outside the trade. Its generally accepted that this is need to know information. There are private message boards, Yahoo groups, Google groups national and local boards that have ladies sections, escort only sections, where people who have been in the business a while can share what they’ve learned and pass that knowledge on to others who might need it. Where the prying eyes of shady people and government agencies don’t have free rein . They are closed forums you often have to prove your legitimacy as an escort to gain access to them and they are closed for a very real reason. To keep people safe.
Once you tell someone how you do something you then have opened up a way for them to get around that process and get around it they will and they have. Your process becomes obsolete, it no longer keeps you safe and you rely on that process to keep you out of jail and to keep you breathing. Your screening process is your number one defense. Your greatest risk management tool. Which is why i was so very upset when i came across a link to a blog on twitter. A blog that detailed screening techniques of escorts.
At the recent sex workers conference which was held in Vegas there was a panel on screening. Though i didn’t attend the conference many people i know did and many people i know helped plan the event. People put in a lot of hard work and still others got a lot out of going to the event. The moderator of this particular panel after the conference put up a blog post with the notes from the conference detailing some specific escort screening techniques as well as the full audio of the panel in question.I don’t know who the panel speakers were i only recognised one name of one current respected working escort. The moderator was himself not an escort. It wasn’t just about escort screening but also touched on other areas of legal sex work and screening for them.
Now i have issue with the blog post itself, as there is so much bad info mixed in with the screening techniques that it not only does harm one way but other ways as well and if it was posted in private escort only form i would have spoke up about the bad info and detailed why i felt it wasn’t viable and not to be relied on but it was public and not private forum where this trade info was posted and my main concern was to try to reason with the blog owner to take the info down or edit out the escort screening techniques specifics.
The blog owner decide to leave it it. This person who is NOT an escort decided he said with the input of some other people to leave the information available to all who wished to find it including LE, creepy douchebags who like to hurt women and blacklisted clients.
I suppose this person doesn’t field requests from law enforcement who try to book appointments and want to take people to jail. I suppose this person doesn’t have to field requests from angry men who think escorts are easy prey and targets because what they do is illegal and they think they can get away with robbing us, harming us and even killing us. But i do, my colleagues do, we do on a daily basis
On my website anyone can see what I ask my potential clients to provide, someone might think based on that they can tell how i screen but that wouldn’t be the case. Telling someone what info you need and detailing to someone what you do with that information are two very different things! We need screening to be a bit mystified for the general population. Its a trade secret, it needs to remain a trade secret or it puts all of us in danger.
Is this another case of someone who is not an escort knowing whats best for escorts? Possibly, I mean were to stupid to know our business and whats best for us… right? We need someone who is not in the business to tell us whats best for us. I don’t believe this person has malicious intentions but they are not self identified as an escort, they do not live it and breath it on the daily. They do not invite strangers into their room to fuck them for money, so they do NOT Know . Hobbyist and clients often think they know all about what its like to be an escort but they don’t they know what its like to be a client. bloggers know knows what its like to be a blogger and though we can all empathise and educate our selves to be as clear as we can about areas of sex work that are not specific to us when you start to think you know whats best for another sex workers area of expertise and actively do something to further YOUR agenda on the matter then you have crossed the damn line. A line has definitely been crossed here.
I get email from new girls to the business regularly and i always do my best to help them out if i can. I’m not the only one who does this. Many long time working girls when approached personally will share what they know. We reference other girls into private groups, just as we reference our clients to other girls. We help them them get listed with screening services , websites and forums. We give back but we do it privately because if you think Law Enforcement doesn’t have its finger on the pulse or that creepy motherfuckers dont scour the net for ways to get round the process we put into place you would be dead… ass…wrong. They do.
Are you willing to put someones life at risk because you think you know whats best for escorts and how they handle their business? Because that’s what we’re talking about here. Are you ready to be responsible for a working girl losing her freedom, her kids, her livelihood because YOU know whats best for her. Its not a bloggers ass on the line… its mine, its my colleagues its the hundreds of working girls who go out there every day and do the best they can to manage their risk so they can come home from work and enjoy their lives.
I thought long and hard before i decided to write this, i know not everyone will agree with me and that there is a small faction of escorts out there that think that putting this out there helps people get access to info they need and it does. It also arms those that wish to do those very same people harm with a way to do it. I know that info about screening has been leaked other places but this was information that was shared at a sex workers conference where it was supposed to be a safe place for sex workers and its now up on a fully search-able, googleable, indexed public blog and it was put up there by a panel moderator. I cant believe the short sightedness of this terrible decision. I’m floored by the irresponsibility of the whole thing. This isn’t keeping sex workers safe and its just plain wrong. I cant just stand by and be silent and let this pass. Remaining silent on the subject is the same as supporting it and i fully strongly and 100% do not support providing non escorts the details of how we as a group screen our clients to remain safe.
I’m not linking the blog because my readers are vast and this isn’t a closed forum but if you are a sex worker and don’t already know of which blog I’m speaking about email me firstname.lastname@example.org and i will mail you the link.
Hostess doesn’t tell you how they make Twinkies because its a TRADE SECRET but if the Hostess Twinkies recipe was to be decimated to the bakery community at large the end result would never be that a women lost her freedom or ended up murdered in a strange cities hotel room.
Update: 8/5/10 The blog owner of the blog in question sent me an email asking for a couple days to try to work this out and im hopeful that it can be.