I had a conversation with a male friend about his latest relationship going south. In the course of this conversation he mentioned how they had a pregnancy scare. So i asked “did the condom break or something” i then found out that birth control wasn’t something he generally used. I was taken back a bit. I thought in this day and age everyone wrapped it up.
Skip ahead to a conversation with one of my best civvie girlfriends, she’s been traumatic relationship free for about 5/6 months now and has been casually hooking up with many hot boys (a necessary part of getting over the old guy) she then tells me a rather torrid tale of her screwing some hot guy on her front porch after being out watching a band….. SANS CONDOM. I was pretty fucking pissed off at her. I reminded her that if she were to get “The Herps” all that casual fucking would come to a screeching halt, not to mention the likelihood of catching something more serious. She was generally sheepish about it but her rational … its not easy to have condoms on you, or how expensive they are. excuses, excuses, excuses.
The other day i saw a client who tried to convince me to fuck him bareback. I refused, he was rather persistent, i still refused. It totally ruined the session, I couldn’t get into it, i kept checking to make sure he didn’t slip off the condom and try to trick me. I mean like every fucking 2 mins i was checking, I wont ever, ever, ever, be seeing him again. I told my best escort pal all about him, she was as pissed as i was about his bullshit and sympathised with my situation. We’ve all come across some nasty pig in a work situation who thinks they are so special that we will forgo our well thought out rules and screw them bare. As fucking if.
Are escorts the only sexually responsible people out there? I am very careful and sexually responsible not only for my own health but because i want to protect the health of the man in my life. But even before i was involved with him i would never think of NOT wrapping that shit up. Maybe its because i fuck for a living that I’m responsible about it, because ive been confronted with what i do and I’ve examined the risks. I’ve thought about them, I’ve thought about ways to to minimize them. I don’t personally know any escorts that don’t take precautions about their health, that don’t get tested on a regular basis, that don’t bitch and moan about how much they HAVE to spend on condoms, std testing, etc. It seems that my real world non sex worker friends are pretty damn casual about their sexual health, they are sleeping around (a lot!) and taking amazing risks.
Hey I’m all for sleeping around, I’m just for doing it responsibly. I mean how hard is it in this day and age to have a rubber on you and to fucking use it, i mean good god you don’t know where that dick has been!
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It’s not easy to have condoms on you? Does she not have a purse? Or any other way in which to carry things? That girl needs panties with a built-in condom pocket.
I’m not an escort, but I don’t understand how anyone could NOT use a condom, which many of my friends senselessly forego. Speaking of which, you should move to New York, because condoms are free here.
I love your blogs!You always make excellent points!
Y’know, everyone’s nerves are arrayed slightly differently, and for some guys, there’s just no point to sex with a condom. If you aren’t sleeping with that many people, you can reasonably think about your odds and take a shot. I had this come up recently because I met a girl, went on a few dates, and then we had unprotected sex… but she’d almost exclusively dated middle class white heterosexual men, she claimed to have been tested in the more than nine months (!) since the last time she’d had sex, and she’d only slept with a small (mid-to-low single digits) number of men before me, so, y’know, the odds of me, as a circumsized heterosexual man, contracting something serious like AIDS, was so remote as to be roughly a little worse than the odds that would justify building a fully-stocked bomb shelter in the basement of my apartment building.
You get your information and play your odds.
In the business is a must in the real world is a … barden for young peeps especially. I don’t think thay are silly I think they are fucked up on the head!
I hated clients that try to convince you for 30 min of the session to do bareback grrr.
Love the blog.
The disease thing really freaks me out and I always totally insist on condoms in my personal life. At work, nothing gets inserted anywhere at any time.
I don’t know how you guys put up with it. And I thought erotic massage was tough at times. I think I’d be totally neurotic about checking and double checking the condom with EVERY client. Yikes!
Oh the irony. They look down on sex workers, but they are fully prepared to have casual bareback sex with some slapper they have picked up that night, probably never to see again…
Before you tell me off… both parties are slappers, and should know better.
When I take the moral high ground on subjects like this it make me look a hypocrite, but I know where my priorites lie..
In my personal experience, European men are much worse when it comes to condom use than their American counterparts. At first I was very impressed with this, but then I realized it’s probably because Americans are more disease- and hygiene-obsessed than Europeans. Well, whatever the reason, it is nice that you don’t have to force the issue to get them to put on a condom.
That being said, I am not exactly the most careful when it comes to condom use. 9 times out of 10, I would use a condom when sleeping with somebody for the first time, but I have been known to be drunk and reckless. At the moment, I’m not on the pill (tried it in the past – made me very depressed and gave me even worse mood swings), so my boyfriend and I use good ol’ coitus interruptus in the “safe” period, and condoms otherwise. Yup, I know: not good.
It proves to me that Pro’s are safer sex than any one night stand girls.
I’ve frequented parlor girls all my life and feel safe with them because they insist on condom use and so do I. Stick to your rubbers girls and thank you