How to get in my pants without paying

I get this a lot. “ Yo baby we should hook up” umm okay, pass my screening and how much time do you want to pay for? oh you don’t want to pay for my time? You just want me to give it away to you for free… Why, cuz you’re special?

Here’s a handy, dandy list to help you see if you qualify for a tasty bite of Jenny sans greenbacks.

1. You must host, at your home.
-There is no way i’m meeting you in some hotel/ motel, your “friends” house, your RV or your car. No we cannot go to my place. I don’t want you to know where I live.

2. Your place must be clean!
– If your place resembles a frat house, an outhouse or your mother’s basement or if you have posters haphazardly pined to the walls and dirty dishes in the sink … I’m out!

3. You must be tall
– I’m a tall girl, so you need to be taller then me. 6 foot to 6’4. I will know if your 5’9 pretending to be 6 foot tall. I always do.

4. You must be hung
– I’m talking big, fat, long, thick 8+ tasty cock. Oh and its got to be functional with no help for the little blue meanie. Viagra is cheating.

5. You must be hot.
I mean Mens Fitness hot. Not quirky hot, not once was hot, not on your way to being hot. I mean head turning hot. Oh and no tude, if you act like your hot and everyone wants you, I wont.

6. you got to be funny, I mean really funny.
-If you can’t make me laugh in between rounds of you making me squeal with delight then forget it. Nothing sexier then a man with a good sense of humor.

7. Over 30 but under 45
-I have found that as pretty as you youngsters are you just don’t know how to fuck yet. And older dudes as much as I adore you and your long practiced skills I really need a guy who is capable of fucking more then twice a day. No your mouth, hands, and collection of sex toys won’t do. I need cock.

there ya have it… the get it for free check list.

You must possess ALL these qualities. If you do then maybe you could have a shot at a free roll in the hay with Jenny. However… I cant think you’re an idiot and only an idiot would ask an escort to fuck them for free without knowing her …

Big Kiss,