You dont have to be a star baby

Say Cheeze
I am not a porn star, not even close. I have never had sex on film for money, not once. Granted i did bust out the video camera once with a guy i was dating and filmed a little blow job, once upon a time but it was only for our personal use and i still have the tape (its stuck in the broken camera!) and well come on who hasn’t done that! I’ve been accused of being a porn star more often then i think is warranted. Its true that i make fetish videos and that in these videos i sometimes show off my amazing all natural milky white boobs. I also have numerous nudie pictures of me floating around the tubes. But that doesn’t make me a porn star. I started making the fetish videos just this last fall in late 2010, just a little FYI. The first time i was called a porn star was by a childhood friend at a school reunion. I explained to her that i wasn’t one. At that time in my life i had a small fetish members website where i basically did some weird naked performance art type stuff and it was all stories and stills, soft core stuff and at the most all R-rated in nature. She then told pretty much anyone who would listen, that i was in fact a porn star and well she decided that we couldn’t really be close anymore. It was very sad for me because i have known this women since i was 6 years old. This was all well before i even had a thought in my head about escorting.

 

No pictures please!
The next time i was accused of being a porn star was by the ex girlfriend of a man i was very casually dating. Okay i was fucking him not really “dating”  he was a hot tattooed love boy who was all about my ass. Go figure. This ex of his saw that we were connected on some social networking site and harangued him for fucking a porn star. Called me every name in the book, talked to anyone who would listen about what a diseased whore i was and spent a good portion of her time trying to ruin my reputation with people who knew me in a professional work capacity. I suppose she got the idea i was a porn star because i had a couple saucy pics from pro shoots on my social networking profile and lets face it i mouth off about sex and i always have… a lot. My photos at that time were far from pornographic but i assume that’s the source of her scorn of my “porn career”

 

 

I have been called a porn-star many times since those first couple situations which were both before i entered the sex for money trade and its always used as an insult as some way to hurt and shame me. It doesn’t hurt me though and it sure doesn’t shame me it does however annoy the fuck out of me because its inaccurate to call me that. It sure as hell isn’t going to make me feel bad about myself to accuse me of something I’m not and haven’t done. I have a lot of friend who work in that side of the business, who are in fact porn stars, ex porn-stars. I’m not ashamed of them, for them, or about them. Just as I’m not ashamed of what i have chosen to do with my body and my life.I know i live in a little bit of a liberal thinking bubble and that makes it easy for me to stand up and be proud of myself and my friends and and that if i lived in podunk where ever that it would be a harder stand. Id still do it but it would be harder, I’m very aware of that.

Better a naked girl then a politician!
Now i once again have had to deal with the “pornstar” accusation as it has reared its ugly stupid inaccurate head. Why must people insist on attempting to shame those who chose a different path then they would take? I mean i don’t spend my time trying to shame you or hurt you because you decided to be an investment banker, a politician or a lawyer and god knows what i do and what porn stars do for a living is more honest and a lot less shady then those careers, a hell of a lot less shady.

 

Origins of Goodtime Jenny

I know you think you’re so smart and that you believe i got the “good time”  part of my name Good Time Jenny from Tommy Tutones 867-5309 and though i use that song a lot in promotions marketing and just for fun (i wear a t-shirt that just has the numbers on it) its not the origins of where i got Good Time Jenny. That goes back further, that goes back to Freddie. Freddie Mercury along with Joe Strummer of The Clash is one of my heroes. I know that might seem a strange combo but punk rock and glam rock but its really not if you think about it. Both artists were real artist living their truth, bucking the system, being their own people, the rest of the word could go fuck off. I love that about both of them. I wish i was more like that, that i could have just a little drop more of those qualities burning though me. I try but unfortunately i tend to care what people think more than i should. So every once in a while i spend the day listening to Queen and thinking of Freddie or play The Clash real fucking loud and then watch the Future Is Unwritten and i try to absorb a little piece of my heroes.

“if you’re looking for a good time, just gimme a call”

Sexy Work

Nothing about us without us
What is a sex worker? The term sex work was created by sex workers themselves and is deliberately vague. Sex workers encompass a lot of different kinds of sex work. Yes, there are all kinds. Sex worker is not euphemism for prostitute, though prostitutes are sex workers.  Sex workers can be Cam girls, porn stars, erotic masseuses, escorts, Professional Dommes, Strippers, Phone sex operators. Basically people who use their sexuality and emotional labor for their job are sex workers. They work both in the legal side of sex work and the underground illegal world of sex work. I personally work in both. I currently do a lot of different kinds of sex work but for a long time i was simply an escort.  I fucked for cash.

 

I’ve also tried with little success to get involved in sex worker activism. I truly believe that sex worker rights are human rights and coming from the illegal world of escorting i get really angry when people tell me i cant do with my own body what i want to do. That it’s legal for me to screw a guy because he bought me dinner, or because its easier to fuck him then to try to disengage and not fuck him after a date, or because its Thursday but i can not fuck him because he offers me cash to do so. My sexual/emotional labor I’m allowed to give away to whom ever i want but the government wants to put laws on my body mind and soul telling me i cant sell it. The honest exchange is not allowed but the manipulation and underhanded emotional bullshit that often comes along with sex… that well that is encouraged. It’s ass backwards to me and yes part of the appeal of my working as an escort is because i like to buck the system and don’t like anyone telling me how to live my life. Really its for the money but the rebel in me gets a certain thrill at being a little bit of an outlaw.

She works hard for the money
My life would be easier if escorting was legal or decriminalized. I wouldn’t have to worry about going to jail to make my rent, i wouldn’t have to be wrought with fear if i needed to go to law enforcement because someone tried to harm or rob me. I would have access to the same services everyone else had with out fear of reprisals. It would also go a long way to helping to eliminate the stigma that comes along with sex work. Once a whore always whore. That stigma is very real and though many escorts live a secret life and no one knows of their sex work its a stigma we live with, we even brand ourselves. It can and does fuck with your head. Even the most grounded have played the “how could i have let my life come to this” game at one point or another. Destigmatizing escorting is a good first step in helping to over come those stigmas. It will be a long haul though, of that i am painfully aware.

 

Other kinds of sex work is already on that path. 10 years ago young women didn’t aspire to be porn stars, now many do. The profession is much more legitimate and socially acceptable. I believe a lot of that is to do with the concerted effort of porn companies like Vivid Video working double time to cross over to mainstream acceptance. Of course the Internet and having all that material at your fingertips didn’t hurt as well.  However that doesn’t mean there is no stigma its MORE legitimate and acceptable its not entirely legitimate and acceptable. Women are still cast out of families for having been in porn, years later they are fired from jobs because of their porn past, they are branded whores and bad women forever. And that’s the legal side of sex work add a prostitution arrest and in some cases registering as a sex offender for 10-15 years for being a prostitute and your life will change forever… and not for the better.

SWOP-LA
I have really high hopes that someday sex workers will have the rights that all workers have and the recourse, services that all workers have but it will be a long, long fight with very little resources and lots and lots of hard hard work. I’m trying to be more involved. Ive hooked up with my local chapter of SWOP (sex workers outreach project) in a very small way. SWOPLA has a new director Jessie Nicole, shes bright eyed, enthusiastic and really wants to do some good AND she needs your help, your input and your support. She also needs your cash (hey, it’s tax deductible). So do something good for sex work and sex workers alike. Help her out with something, Throw a few bucks into the kitty, volunteer a little time at an event to get the word out or just write her an “i support what you’re doing letter” Do a little good today you will feel better for it, i know i do.

Love letters

To whom it may concern
It happened again as it does almost weekly. Another women not in the sex for money biz asking me for help in how to get into the sex for money biz. I have written over and over again who I’m not going to help people get into turning tricks. Not going to do it so stop asking me. Since they all seem to find me via this blog were i specifically stated i will NOT help you i find int baffling why i still get these emails. The email usually come in two forms.

 

 

A. I’m a educated self assured women who wants to get into the business and have real relationships with a few rich men.

B. I’m the worlds best lay so i should be getting paid for it.

To person A: go find a rich boyfriend because with all your self perceived super smarts you have bought into the TV movie aspect of the high priced call girl. Oh and I’m not helping you.

To person B. Go fuck for free, to get your need for your super fucking skills ego stroked. its not about how well you fuck, its about how well you service your clients needs. Oh and I’m not helping you.

figure it out on your own
One of my major complaints with my life as a hooker is the entitlement issues i have to deal with. I have written about this a lot, how i cant stand entitlement how it gets under my skin,  how i dont react well to those that have that particular issue. So it really chaps my hide when some self proclaimed PhD wanna be hooker asks me to mentor her out of the kindness of my cold black bitter heart. Fuck you, I spent years learning my craft, to find my way in and out of this sex for money world, i did it though trial, error, the seat of my pants and my god given ability to think on my feet. I’m not about to give up all i know to a complete fucking stranger because she thinks i should. Entitled bitches can kiss my ass just as hard as entitled hobbyists.

 

 

I did muse to a friend at lunch yesterday after reading her portions of the latest email beg for part of my soul that maybe this latest hopeful should be a ho considering how much she thought she was owed by strangers. I see way to much if that attitude in an industry that’s supposed to be service oriented. Way too much.

Milquetoast

Which way to go
New direction, new focus, new, new, new. I’ve been writing this blog for close to 4 years and when I started, it was a place for me to comment on my life of being a hooker. How i saw myself, my place as it were in the escort world. A place where I could speak freely with out reprisals from moderators on message boards and website owners. Since the bulk of the culture at that time was focused on the all mighty message board. It was a place and a way where i controlled my content, could find my voice, and speak my mind and my truth. Though naive and silly me I did suffer reprisals from my blogging by unscrupulous ass hats who thought their reach was further then it was. They tried to chase me off message boards, harm my business with  back channel chatter, spread rumors lies and my personal info all over the net. I’ve even had websites dedicated to little ole me for speaking my truth about being an escort. Yes, there were reprisals. However they didn’t discourage me from writing, (obviously) they only served to make themselves look like insane and desperate power grabbers trying to take up against an independent blog, on a message board/website/etc., it was in no way connected to or had any authority over. So yeah, fuck those guys.

 

As the years trudge on I find my focus changing. My life is changing, both personally and professionally. More changes are coming over the next few months with me as well.  The kind of sex work I do is changing. I have and I am broaden my horizons, trying new things reinventing and revisiting things i used to do before i was an actual real live hooker with a heart of gold. My personal life is changing in major ways, which affects my work life. That happens when you do sex work and have a relationship ive learned. As the relationship changes so does your work. So this blog will be changing with me.

I never cared for spinach
I have spent some time going back over this blog and what it is that people respond to. What kinds of things resonate more then other things, basically what do people want me to write about. What is it that provokes the most and strongest reactions and what garners me the most attention both from my piers in sex work, the curious non sex worker and the easily titillated media,  of which I have had many brushes with (both wanted attention and unwanted) and I can tell you this… its not only writing about fucking for cash. So i will be expanding this blog.. my blog, to encompass more of what interests me as i evolve and what i perceive as what interests my readers who have got to be sick and tired of the hooker only talk as much as I am.

 

I also get more accolades with my writing when i slice and dice bullshit and tell things as i personally see it. Playing nice …  well I’m over that. It seems people think I make people angry and invoke strong reactions even when I’m working hard to be inclusive and more mild, so why bother trying to temper what i do? Seems pointless.  It’s like the person who’s always being accused of cheating on a partner when they are doing nothing of the sort. Sooner or later they are going to have the inclination to do the actual cheating since they are always being accused of doing it anyways.

You wouldn't like me when I'm angry
You thought i provoked a strong reactions before? Well hold onto your hat because you haven’t seen anything yet. I’m pissed, I’m looking for new direction, and unlike some people out there in la la bullshit sex worker land…I know how to accomplish things and I’m not afraid to say what ever it is i feel like saying… in any way I feel like.

 

I don’t want to be milquetoast. As I’ve said over and over though out my life the worst sin you can commit is to bore your audience. I’m  lot of things .. but I’m not boring.